just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
You know it was a good night when you wake up w/o a shirt in someone elses living room next to a pancake on a spoon in a bowl of spaghetti.
If a weird guy texts you in the near future asking if you are satan just go with it
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
Randomize
