Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
Apparently it's ok to apply for building permits drunk. I feel like there definitely is a law preventing that.
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
I'm sorry, when did "I like your shit" become an acceptable pickup line?
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
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