I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
Went to anytime fitness at 3:34 am drunk after the the bar and getting whataburger. Lifted weights with my cheeseburger between my knees. That's called DEDICATION.
The cop was more concerned with the syringes on the dash board than looking for the source of the smoke. Thank god for diabetes!
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
If making out with three guys at once at a Kesha concert while simultaneously smearing glitter all over yourself doesn't convince her you're gay, nothing will
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
If its not for food we ain't going out.
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
Randomize
