kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
we're about an hour out, how's the weather?
cloudy with a chance of strippers and cocaine, you're favorite. welcome home.
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
Tell me about it I woke up on your couch with only my underwear on and a 26 year old wrapped around me. I thought my thirties would be different.
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
Randomize
