Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
The make-up sex just reminded me why we broke up in the first place.
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
Hey welcome to Rick's drunk text tree. Rick is drunk right now please respond with "shut up" to remove your name from this list. Thanks for playing.
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
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