when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
Just stole a pregnancy test from Wegmans because I didn't want to pay 13 dollars to find out my life is over.
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
When I opened my laptop there was a half eaten little debbie oatmeal cream pie inside.
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
Right now, millions of people are waking up to get ready for work, start their day, and be productive members of society. I just found a 40 stashed in my fridge. I'm getting daybreak drunk. Zero fucks are given.
Isn't being unemployed beautiful sometimes?
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
Definitely went to court without a bra and panties because Mr. LastNight’s dog stole them. I guarantee you I was the only lawyer going commando in court
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