Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
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