Thank God for loud music. There is a circus in my butt right now.
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
a girl just told me i should have been born earlier in the alphabet
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
I need to ask my mom where the drain cleaner is, but I'm afraid she'll ask why and the answer to that will just be "cum."
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
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