Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
i just got drunk and created an entire Dr Seuss unit for my first graders.
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
Randomize
