perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
I'm either too drunk or not bisexual anymore
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
Randomize
