I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
I kept yelling "BY ORDER OF THE PEAKY FUCKING BLINDERS" in a terrible brummie accent at everyone I saw wearing a flatcap.
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