I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
Operation: pick up a lawyer was a resounding success. Commence operation: football mugshot weekend
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
Enjoy the penises
Listen, if I miss the flight to Vegas because she's still rimming my ass, it will have been worth it.
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
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