Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
Call me in 2 minutes and go along with what I say. You're hysterical and I must go comfort you asap. He just asked if I was ready to experience sex with a wizard and he wasnt kidding.
Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
Randomize
