that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
Mystery solved: The table is broken because I had sex on it last night.
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
Randomize
