yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
Look, you don't know disfunction until you've sat on the john taking a shit and crying while totally sober.
Please remind me next time not to call the ex who cheated on me to cry about the ex who forgave me for putting him in prison. It would be much appreciated.
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
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