Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
For some reason 'start yourself on fire drunk' isn't nearly as funny after last 4th of july..
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
The Domino's delivery guy is in front of me at The Wendy's drive-through. Hmmm.....
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
Randomize
