I must be too annoying 4 u.
Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
So squirting runs in the family.
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
You ate ashes out of my bong
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
Randomize