some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
My pussy is not your playground.
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
Im sitting next to shitfaced santa at the cuse game. My plan to be on television is now flawless
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
I am alternating between eating dry cheerios and mint chocolate chip ice cream with a fork. Please love me because no one else will
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
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