Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
i got kicked out of the casino for drunken disorderly conduct because i kept stumbling into old people and one of them told on me. as the boucer was taking down my information so i could no re-enter i ripped my id out of his hands while yelling fuck you.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
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