Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
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