i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
OPIZZABONMYDICK
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
Screaming "dámelo" at the bottle of scotch was definitely my best and worst moment of Cinco de Mayo 2015.
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
Randomize
