My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
He has no idea I'm scrolling through Instagram while he's going down on me. I'm so bored.
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
Randomize
