so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
the staff put glowsticks in the urinals of the porta-pottys last night and honestly drunk me has never been more grateful for anything in his life
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
Drunk me says 72 hours of Mexican Viagra and room service.Sober me says we stopped being lovers for a reason after the last lost weekend.
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
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