After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
I literally just skipped to the fridge when I realized we had enough vodka left to get day drunk
I had to say goodbye to one of my fuck buddies last night. He's voting for Trump, we shouldn't be doing it anyways.
Randomize
