i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
I just mixed tequila and nyquil in front of dad. hes making ambulance jokes but let me tell you its DELICIOUSSS
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
Randomize
