Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
trust me, there is no more disappointing feeling in the world than waking up at 4 in the morning with a random half naked chick in your bed and then realizing your roommates girlfriend just wandered into the wrong room.
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
I know, it's just the worst. Also, security almost took the burrito I brought for lunch. I thought I was going to have to pull a Liz Lemon and eat the whole thing before I could go through.
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
I just traded a couple nudes for pizza delivery. Call me lazy, easy, or an entrepreneur, but either way I'll have dominoes in 15 minutes.
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
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