I'm pouring my heart out in these texts and you're going around showing everyone???
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
I have an empty apartment, Chinese food, and fresh batteries in my vibrator. There's nothing on this earth that could lure me out tonight.
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
Randomize
