seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
The doctor said 'youre the 2nd youngest person that ive seen with this condition. Thats probably not the silver medal you were looking for today.'
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
Did I fall on/off the boat yesterday? Cuz my right leg looks and feels like if it got hit by shrapnel.
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
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