before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
I should have known it wouldn’t work. Someone saved in her phone as “Subway Sex” called the week before the wedding
Randomize
