Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
I just pynch a tree in the face
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
I woke up upside down with my head in your ottoman and like a foot of space between the ottoman and chair.. My legs were straight up in the air... Yes. Your mother found me.
Randomize
