My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
He stood me up and then his cat died. I feel like this is Gods way of saying he's on my side, even after the tequila fiasco.
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
Randomize
