yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
At 3:00am my whole house started smelling like cooking meat. I have no idea why she thought it was a good idea to crock-pot a WHOLE turkey that early in the morning.
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
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