No, drunk sperm still make babies.
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
I just asked my mom if I could be the drunk realitive at the reunion. She said as long as I'm not obvious.
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
I'd rather explain to the cops why I'm naked than why I'm drunk.
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
Randomize
