Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
How did you get a free t-shirt at the strip club?
I was attacked by whores
You threw up on yourself again didn't you?
They were strong whores
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
I’m going to cut back. New Year, New Me
I would never wish less dick on anyone but do what you gotta do
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
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