He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
Today I realized that I've had whole drunk relationships with people. And sober me has and wants no part in it.
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
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