yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk
Dad stumbling and puking in the White Castle parking lot = Father's Day success
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
Randomize
