just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
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