We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
here I sit at Southern Illinois' finest pubs and I thought I heard your laugh. I was sadly astonished to turn and find a midget cracking herself up reading the label on her can of chewing tobacco...
So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
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