I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
You can't just hum the Jaws theme song when you pull down my pants.
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
I convinced a shit ton of people I was a russian foreign exchange student to get free drinks. I knew learning those accents would come in handy.
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
Randomize
