so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
I woke up and found a doughnut on our front porch. It's not sketchy though. More like a gift from the gods.
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
It's a "nonproductive" (vocab word) cough. It's like a constant tickle in my throat, like there's a little elf with feathers for feet going Gangnam style on my "uvula" (vocab word).
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
Randomize
