Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
He wants Portugal to lose so badly he threw out all the sangria. You know how depressing it is to watch someone dump 4 gallons of heaven?
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
Then you guys just all showered together...?
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
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