So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
Listening to Whitney Houston sing the National Anthem while I shit before going out tonight. America.
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
How do I ask where the Jello shot cups are at Walmart without sounding like white trash?
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
Gotta go, there’s a chick at my door that wants to give me head
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