If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
I thought this guy walking back to the dorms with his black laundry bag was walking a black flamingo I'm not even kidding I had to take a break on a bench after that.
You're my favorite person
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
Randomize
