You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
The bartender told me the best pick-up line was to look deep into her eyes and tell her your gonna flick her vagina
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
areolas are like halos for boobs.
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
My mom said she saw you at the bar last night and asked how you were. She said, you replied with, "Oh you know, just knocked up."
Figured I'd get right to the point
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
Randomize
