you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
There was a lot of him and a little penis
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
I just found a To Do list on the table, written by me last night, that just says "1. Go downstairs. 2. Get Pickles. 3. Laptop"
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
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