They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
He was putting purell on my boobs saying "they need to be clean for later." He hadn't had a drink all night
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
Chasing shots with sriracha-covered mini toast was, in retrospect, not the best idea.
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
Just in case you forgot, you puked all over your boss house, pissed on his coffee table, and were then thrown out by his wife
Randomize
