The panties match.
I'll be right there.
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
I five year old is judging me because I just opened a bottle of Sam Adams with my teeth before 8am
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
Last night was a sign that I need to stop sleeping with any girl that can quote the mighty ducks
Specially the ones that look like Goldberg
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
Randomize
