hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
Ya know, sometimes when he kisses me in public I want to scream "HE DRIVES A PORSCHE!" so people watching understand that I don't have low standards, I'm just very materialistic.
you're my knight in shining pee-resistant armor
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
Coworker just walked in thirty minutes late reeking like weed and clutching a handful of scratch-off tickets. Also, there’s still a stripper pole in my office. Happy Wednesday!
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