is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
My wrist bandage is guacamole stained. What an accurate representation of my life as a whole
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
Randomize
