I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
We just filmed our own version of iron chef. The secret ingreient was whisky.
What did you cook with whisky?
We started a fire.
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
NEW RULE: can't hook up with more than 50% of the groomsmen in wedding party or it becomes wrong kind of weird. NUMBERS GAME.
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
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